Tuesday, January 19, 2010

crap, part two

today wasn't any better. can you believe that? and i don't even have a good picture to show for it today :(!!!
i had to spend the whole of my only childless morning getting my hair done (which DESPERATELY needed to be done, TRUST ME! i've been waiting weeks longer than i should have to go so that it would be done & stay looking decent until i can get back after the baby), only to have my hairdresser tell me the color just isn't taking as it usually does due to my hormones (???!!!??!!!! #**%#@!!!!!!!!). then i got to pay the exorbitant amount of money that getting your hair done costs these days & walk out wanting to cry. hormones are wrecking my life!
and hudson was acting stinky again, throwing fits @ many a turn.
and clint's car needs a $1000 repair. (the worst part being that the whole car is barely worth $1000)
so with all of this & a few other later incidents (like you know, it hitting me again that hudson's big boy bed isn't finished, his walls aren't painted, his quilt not finished...), i was ready to melt away. AWAY!
feeling sorry for yourself feels good for a little while, you know? and then you think about something like Haiti & you then feel even worse than when you started!
so i did that whole thing - i felt sorry for myself. really sorry. & then i felt horrible for feeling sorry, which really didn't help. then i just let myself feel frustrated, because that's just how i felt!
THEN i started to take some deep breaths & tried to relax. i thought about what i needed to learn & what god's bringing me in the midst of this situation.
& THEN i started thinking about all the things i'm so very thankful for (like being alive, for one! forget hair color!) & that's when i started to feel better. (though i'm still a little concerned when i pass a mirror!)
i also thought about what kind thing i could do for myself, as i was feeling so stressed. i think we often forget to take care of ourselves, you know? i decided doing a little sewing & eating a little chocolate would do wonders (& i was right!).
except it turned into a lot of chocolate.
but that's okay :)

(& for those of you still worried about my hair, we decided to wash it a few times & see what happens - usually it lightens a good deal, so i'm hoping that's the case this time, even with the hormones! then i'll just have to go back if i'm still not happy. thanks for caring! haha! )

1 comment:

Christy said...

you poor thing! those hormones can make us crazy can't they! and the million things that need to be done before the baby comes - i am sorry that you felt overwhelmed - and glad the chocolate helped! i had to come to the realization that it is okay if everything doesn't get done before the baby comes -you can just do it after - i wanted it to be perfect and wonderful and not to have to worry about anything once they were here - but then i realized it was okay if it wasn't and you actually are at home more anyway so you can get those things done at some point in between nursing, sleeping, eating, and doing it all over again!
sorry friend! hope there isn't a crap, part three -:)
(ps - thanks for posting!)

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